Author Archives: Eliza Cramer Jaremko

It was one of those mornings. Both kids were crying in different rooms. My husband and I, on the other hand, were laughing at the whole charade. There was nothing else to do. Why were these two precious children crying, you ask? One was face down on the kitchen floor wailing: “I wanna go toContinue reading “Why? Because I Like You”

“Mommy, what was that silly word you and Daddy kept saying at dinner?” My 4-year-old daughter asked the other night. “A silly word?” I asked, trying to think of what funny thing we could’ve said, since we were mostly talking about the news of the day. Russia had invaded Ukraine. “That silly word!” She repeated.Continue reading “Blue and Yellow”

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” I asked my children. My 2-year-old son hasn’t settled yet. He said, “I go work. I take my bag” My 4-year-old daughter has big plans. She answered, “I’m going to be a mom, and a princess, and work at a church.” We’re all royalty beforeContinue reading “When I Grow Up”

While talking with some dear friends the other day, we discovered that as parents of small children we’d all been seeing similar ads on social media. Ads for “No Yelling Parenting” or “Let the Kids Win Parenting Method” or “Positive Parenting Solutions.” Clearly, Facebook advertisers can hear us yelling at our children. I’d love toContinue reading “The Make It Up As You Go Parenting Method”

“Order please,” my 4-year-old daughter asked, marker and notepad in hand. “I’ll take a grilled cheese,” I responded. She went away to the play kitchen, returning a few minutes later with a plate of plastic foods and Legos. “Yummy,” I said, pretending to eat, “The best grilled cheese yet.” “Mommmmmmy,” Susannah rolled her eyes, “ThatContinue reading “Jesus Moves In”

I stood up on my tippy toes and reached my right hand up as high as I could go, slapping at the taped paper. With my left hand, I gripped the top of the ladder with white knuckles. I thought to myself: don’t die. Do not die today. Your obituary should not read: death byContinue reading “Giant Guidance”

As we stood in line for the hayride to the pumpkin patch, I asked my children: “what size pumpkins do you want to pick?” My 23-month-old son shouted: “ORANGE!”  The entire line burst into laughter. “Orange pumpkins, it is!” I hugged my sweet boy and smiled. The kids and I were at a local farmContinue reading “Patching the Pumpkins”

I started to climb out on the rocks. I wanted to get the perfect picture of Bass Harbor Head Lighthouse. My husband called to me as I went out: “Be careful, Love! I didn’t check which ERs are in-network on this trip!” “I’m fine,” I called back, “I spent my whole childhood climbing rocks inContinue reading “A Pastor Looks at Forty”

“Ew yuck” my daughter announced, “Mommy, Simon has a stinky bum.” “He does? I don’t smell anything,” I said, as I gave my son a proper pants check. Looking in, I saw it. She was right – toddler noses tell all. But my nose… my nose smelled nothing. Let me repeat that: my nose smelledContinue reading “Bear One Another’s Burdens”

For LBOC, The One We Lost “Name … Birthdate … You’re here for your annual exam? … And you’ve had 3 pregnancies and 2 births.” “Uh Yes,” I replied to the nurse, stunned. “Looks like you’re set then,” she said, as she left. “The doctor will be in shortly.” There it was. Just hanging outContinue reading “When Your Heart is Ready”